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Dear readers and viewers,
Some time has passed by since I’ve written my last post. What has happened? Well, my daughter is 14 months old now and quite a handful of cuteness
And just a bit over one month ago my naked man and I got married. I did not really have the time to concern myself with other naked males, but I did think about this topic and where to go from where I’d left off.
NMHW was born in March 2008. At the time I was determined to get the naked male body as a subject of female desire as much into the spotlight as I possibly could. I did my research, I shared my thoughts, reviewed some books, movies and magazines and I posted as many beautiful male bodies I could get my hands on. Inspired by my experiences with the male customers of the erotic boutique I worked for, I also wrote about male sexuality related themes. The feedback on NMHW so far has been amazing, but sadly not amazing enough to continue.
When I started this project, I had already thought op some theories why the nude male is such a big deal: see my article The Search for Cock. But over time I realized there may be a bigger reason why male nude photography for women is not working: women are not men.
What is the main purpose of erotic nude photography (when it is not made to be art)? Exactly. It is masturbation material. Men can look at a picture of a naked woman – or just the essential body parts of a woman: breasts, ass, vulva – and get turned on in such a way that it is enough to make a masturbation session have a satisfactory ending. For me no photo of a naked man, no matter how erotic or good looking he is, has such an effect on me. To be honest, I do not know any woman who masturbates while looking at photos of male nudes. If there are women who do this, let me know! I do enjoy looking at nice photographs of naked men and if I particularly like one, of course I wonder what it would be like to touch that beautiful body. But that’s where the fantasy ends. Something vital, something that men do not really need, is missing: movement.
In order to imagine if a man is a good lover, I need to know how he moves. If I see an attractive man having sex with someone, I can imagine if he is good or bad at it. If I have the impression he is breathtakingly good, then the naked man starts to turn me on.
I think men do not need to see a naked woman move because they probably fantasize more about what they do to her than what she might do to them. A woman doesn’t necessarily have to do much for the man to have satisfying sex. Even if she would just lay in bed and let herself be taken, it would most likely be quite boring, but it would do. Vice versa though, it surely would not. When sex is perceived in its essence, the woman plays the passive part in the bedroom, the man the active. Receiving and giving. Stagnation and movement.
I assume this is the reason why women do not go crazy over male nude magazines, books or any other medium that shows male nude photography. Therefore the magazines, no matter how good they are, do not survive, illustrated books do not sell enough and no publisher is interested in publishing male nude photography for a female target group – unless you pay for them to print it and honestly, that says enough.
And there is the reason that all good things, even Naked Men, Happy Women, must come to an end. Funny enough, when I started writing this post, an exhibition about naked men opened in the Leopold Museum in Vienna. You can see some of the art work underneath this article. Not the best photos, but I was not allowed to use the flash . Although people who have seen the exhibition poster (the one with the three naked football players) hanging all over town were mostly ‘shocked’ or ‘disgusted’ by seeing completely naked men – people have been covering up the penises on the posters! – there were lots of people attending the exhibition while my husband and I were there…
Anyway, it seems people finally do start to realize the naked man needs more attention – and is worth more attention! The male body is beautiful, erotic and sensual and should not be hidden. I hope my blog has made a worthy contribution to break through and I thank all of you for your support, your compliments and your suggestions! A special thanks is for all the men who have taken the courage to mail me photographs of themselves that I was allowed to share here on Naked Men, Happy Women. Thumbs up, guys!
Today my mailbox made my day. What was waiting for me in there: the latest issue of Filament Magazine and the very, very long awaited second issue of Candy Rain Magazine. I put both in my bag and went to work. As suspected it was quiet, so I was able to fully indulge myself in male nudity and smart reading
Filament’s new issue, the wet issue, is again wonderful. I have to say that men- and photography-wise it has immediately become my favourite of all the eight issues I possess. The photography by H. Morgan is breathtakingly hot and makes me want to make out with my partner right now… Mhh! Also wonderful are the cover guy, the man taking a shower and, and, and… All lovely male bodies!
Of course the reader is treated as usual with good articles to feed the brain. I particularly enjoyed the one about female pirates by Cornelia Grey, the Sex in Water article by Kitty Stryker and Samantha Fraser‘s “Modern Marriage: to have, to hold, to question”. Additionally, there are the steamy, erotic short stories by the three winners of the writer’s contest. True, I was disappointed that my submission was not among the winners. But that does not make me love Filament any less . In fact, I decided to publish it here on my blog. Your feedback is more than welcome!
So what about Candy Rain Magazine?
I pre-ordered the second issue in April last year. Since nothing came, I’d started to fear I had been conned. But Momma D - the ‘cummandeer’ of the magazine – convinced me to be patient, so I waited… and finally… today I received it!
D., D., and more D…
Candy Rain is simply a crazy mad magazine, very colourful, with funny comments, interviews and sexy stories like “La Professora” by Hunter London. There’s even Pac Man sex – for the nerdy ladies among us .
It might all be a bit too much, but if you love cocks you should at least have one issue, for there’s definitely a D in it for every woman’s taste.
The following article by Lisa Wade sadly proves there is still a lot more work to be done.
Please read Gendered Reactions to Male and Female Nudity and share your thoughts on the topic.
What I would like to know, is how both women and men would respond to authentic male nudity instead of a body like the one Sylvester Stalone has. Because let’s be honest here: his body is simply a bit too much. Or? I am certainly not turned on by such an unnatural bunch of muscles.
I was actually looking for more interesting and especially smart articles about male nudity when I stumbled upon the following text by Jane A. Thomas: ‘Male Nudity Does Not Lead to Women’s Sexual Arousal’. You understand I had to read this. And huray, I got annoyed! Being annoyed means I can write a critical review and yes, I admit, I love writing critical reviews.
The title made me wonder when this article had come into being. I thought it had to be quite old, but it dates from 2009. Oh dear…
The following four quotes made me want to cry:
“Since women tend to be shocked by male nudity, especially genitals, they are censored in our society. Women admire men more for their status or achievements: in smart dress or uniform.”
Eureka! Now we know the reason why male nudity/the penis is censored in our society: because women are shocked by it! That explains why women like to grab it, play with it, feel it, caress it, taste it – and secretly wonder what it is like to have one themselves, well, for a day or two, not longer of course .
That women don’t like men because they are sexy, gorgeous and attractive, we’ve already known for decades. That’s why we all marry extremely rich, powerful men wearing uniforms.
“The film ‘The Wedding Date’ includes a scene where Dermot Mulroney is very relaxed about appearing naked in front of a woman (as if!). The woman’s horrified reaction to a man’s genitals not only indicates how female sexuality differs to male sexuality but also provides a clue as to why women’s sexual arousal is much more elusive with a partner.”
I have no clue what the author means with the end of the second sentence. This is also one of the reasons why this article is badly written. Not only is it stereotypical, insulting (especially towards men) and quite incoherent, the author states something without giving any thorough explanation. No wonder, since it is based on… on what?
“Men’s sexual arousal arises from looking at images of the naked body of a sexual partner, which explains the daily sales of pornographic magazines. Women, who have explored eroticism and learned about their own sexual arousal through female masturbation, will know that female sexual arousal arises more from the context of relationships and sexual scenarios (sexual fantasies) than from images of the male body.”
Again, I’d like to know on what information, or better yet what research this statement is based. Men do not fantasize? For men it is all about full-frontal nudity? They don’t enjoy more subtle fantasies? Women don’t get turned on by male nudity? Images of a naked men do not trigger the female imagination? Women are not producing magazines about male nudity and buying them? Sigh…
“Nudity causes men to think about sex even more than usual and they mistakenly assume that women have the same sexual motivations.”
When are people finally going to stop underlining the so-called sexual differences between men and women?! Just because we are meant to think there are, doesn’t mean it is true. For ages we have been taught that male nudity – expecially the penis – is dirty, ugly, pornographic, you name it. I am pretty sure that throughout history there has never been a group of women who decided that from that point on the male body and its genitals are disgusting and therefore shocking. It’s more likely we have a certain institution to thank for that.
Today, in our society, we are not used to male nudity in the way we are used to female nudity. That is the reason why there are still so many women who think male nudity and fantasizing about it is wrong. This idea is programmed in our minds with the goal to prevent women from becoming men- flesh-craving animals . It is also why men feel that male nudity is only meant for the gay community and/or feel awkward and ashamed about showing their awesome bodies and genitals. Consequently, it is also why there still is so little male nudity out there for women to enjoy and LOOK at.